True Confessions

I married my high school teacher!

Woman's Day reader
Sunday, August 21, 2011
student and teacher
"Thomas, who had been my teacher for years 11 and 12, had been every girl's crush as he was not just the only young, attractive male teacher at the all-girls school; he was also a genuinely nice person who we could tell wanted us to succeed."
Woman's Day reader
Topics:
Relationships
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I'm really nervous about going to my 10-year high school reunion in November. It's not that I had a terrible time at school, in fact high school was a fantastic experience. I got on well with all of the teachers, I was vice captain with my best friend Laura was captain, I came first in mathematics each semester and when I compare my figure now to my high school body, well, it's changed for the better!

After school, I started studying science at university and hated every minute of it. I tried hard to please my parents and because everyone expected me to do well. But in the end I just wasn't ready. I dropped out after the first year, saved like crazy over the summer and spent the next four years travelling around South America teaching maths and English. Apart from visits from my family, in that time I completely lost touch with everyone from my life in Australia.

Towards the end of my time living in Peru I started to realise it was time to go home and grow up, and I was excited to give university another go. I moved back in with my parents, enrolled in Education at uni and breezed through the course.

My mum encouraged me to catch up with my best friends from high school, but I felt a bit nervous meeting up with Laura and the girls after five years which felt like five decades. When I had been climbing pyramids on my own and meeting new friends over tacos, my old friends had all been planning their futures together and some even having babies. We all became friends on Facebook but attempts to meet up were never realised.

For my first teaching practical I went to work at a public boys' school in the outer suburbs of Sydney and discovered to my delight that my supervisor was my favourite maths teacher from high school. Thomas, who had been my teacher for years 11 and 12, had been every girl's crush as he was not just the only young, attractive male teacher at the all-girls school; he was also a genuinely nice person who we could tell wanted us to succeed.

Thomas was still the fantastic teacher I remembered him to be and in the first few weeks of my first practical Thomas gave me lots of helpful advice as well as being fascinated to listen to my stories from my time in South America. It felt so good to talk to him, and in our break times I started asking Thomas about his life too. He had just gone skydiving for his 33rd birthday and loved spending the weekends with his sister's kids.

One day he explained that he had stopped teaching at my high school the year after my year group had left because he felt a lot of pressure being a male teaching at an all-girls school. I was about to joke about how to my 17-year-old self he was the closest thing to Leonardo DiCaprio I had seen in my life. Then I realised that my 25-year-old self felt attracted to him in a completely new and very adult way.

I was embarrassed to feel myself blushing and remembering the way my friends and I used to talk about him after class and felt really awkward around him for the last few weeks of my prac. I could tell he was confused about the way I avoided being alone with him and I really missed being able to ask him for advice — really I just missed talking to him.

On my last day Thomas organised a going-away afternoon tea for me and when he came over to give me a card and flowers from the staff he asked if he could speak to me privately.

I followed him down the corridor until he suddenly stopped and stood looking at me without speaking for a few seconds. It was the first time we had been alone together for weeks and my heart was racing. I felt so sad to be leaving the school and I also accepted that I was sad to leave him too. I was tempted to ask him out but was worried he would feel it was too odd since he had been my teacher so long ago.

When he asked whether I would be interested in coming back to the school for my next prac I was stunned for a minute. I had been thinking about him on a more personal level but there he was thinking about organising the next school term. Of course I replied that I would love to come back and, wanting to get away before he saw the tears that had started welling in my eyes I turned away to walk back to the staff room.

I had taken about three steps back towards the staff room when I heard Thomas say something quietly behind me. I felt his hand on my shoulder and heard him say my name like a question. I turned back to face him and he saw how upset I was. I remember laughing through my tears as I felt his arms come around me.

We have been married for two very happy years now, and I got a full-time job teaching at a school near our house while he still teaches at the boys' school where we met again as adults.

Everything has been wonderful but I am really nervous about going to the reunion with my old teacher as my date. I'm very proud he is my husband, but at the same time I'm nervous for how the other students will react to him and what they will say about him. I'm also anxious about what the other teachers will say when they see that we are together and how they will act towards Thomas.

I'm tempted not to go, but at the same time I'm so curious to see where everyone's lives have taken them and hope to see that they are all as happy as I am.

Your say: Have you had a similar experience? Share your stories and thoughts below.


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User comments
If this is the biggest worry in your life, you have nothing to worry about. There are people with much bigger REAL problems and you should count your blessings!
hey I think this is a lovely story and there is nothing wrong as you are both adults. I in fact had the biggest crush on my teacher 30 yrs ago and i saw him earlier this year and i relized i still have feelings for him. But as im married i still say its only a crush i have. I wish you both all the very best.
A few years ago I went with my mum to her 30 yr high school reunion, which was hilarious to me in sooo many ways, mostly because i was in yr 11 at the time and it was interesting to hear all the stories, and realise that hey things that happen now happened back then too, such as pregnancys, and the pranks and such. But one thing i found really interesting was that my mums math teacher was there with his wife... who was a women who had been in the grade above my mum! basically since it was a small country town young teachers would spend like 2 or so yrs and get their degree paid for or something, and this math teacher actually stayed longer just to wait until she had finished school so they could be together.. and here they were 30 yrs later! So dont worry, you are not alone, and it entirely different when you are adult and it is after school is finished, they dont have that duty of care.
I think this is a lovely story. You haven't done anything wrong so don't be embarrassed! You fell in love as adults, not as a student and her teacher. Many people spend a lifetime looking for the right person to love - you should be extremely proud that you've found him. Well done!
to be honest thats such a cute story. i would definitely go to the reunion just so i could share it with everyone. i would be so proud if this were my story. second chance meetings are that of fairy tales and i smiled reading that. all the best to the both of you.
There are few reunions where students take their partners since the partners usually don't know anyone unless they went to that school too. If you're nervous then go seperately and then spend time together there. It would be fun to watch everyone's reactions when the truth is revealed.
Not a big deal. my mum had servral friend in ur situation. they to married their high school teachers after meeting again years after graduation. theirs nothing wrong with it
You've got nothing to be ashamed of. Things like this happen. At my year 12 high school formal there was a teacher and student who had pretty much hooked up, and there was a bit of stigmatism with that. The difference in your situation is that it was over five years after high school when you got together. It sounds as if you built a new relationship rather than expanding the one you'd had as a high school student. I can understand your fear, and you may feel uncomfortable, worrying that people are gossiping behind your back, and face it, that will happen. But it's not going to overshadow the experience of seeing those people again. Those people who were close enough to you to know about your overseas adventures should realise that this wasn't a student hooking up with a teacher anyway. Go for it, have fun and congratulations to you both.

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