True Confessions

Brotherly love

Woman's Day reader
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Mother and baby
Picture posed by models

Last year, my husband and I gave birth to a beautiful little boy who we named Rory. My husband, Adam, dotes on him. Even before Rory was born Adam handmade his crib and painted his nursery with lazy tumbling cows and clouds. Rory so far looks like me, with his dad's eyes.

The only problem is I'm not sure his dad is Adam.

Adam's and my third wedding anniversary happened to coincide with his brother Dan's 30th birthday. Dan and I get along really well as we have a similar sense of humour and we're similar in age (I'm 27) and so we travelled to Dan's hometown to have a joint celebration.

On the night of his party, everyone drank a lot, ate a lot, and had an excellent time. When Adam got tired and a bit too drunk, I helped him into bed and left him be.

When the party died down at around 3am, it was just Dan and me. Dan started talking to me about how lonely he was, and how he wanted a relationship with someone, the same sort I had with Adam.

I did the usual spiel, telling Dan how he was a great guy, and good looking with a great job and how any girl would think he was a catch. I then made a joke about how I "picked the wrong brother". Dan looked at me and told me he had always thought that.

He leant into to kiss me, and I realised this was bad, but let him keep leaning in. When Dan's lips touched mine, I had just enough time to compare how different he was to Adam before my arms were around his neck, he laid me down against the deck lounge, and with his weight on top of me, all thoughts of Adam vanished.

We stopped kissing just long enough for Dan to drag me into the pool room, which was a sort of guest room (and empty at the time). Shutting and locking the door, he pulled me down onto the bed and kissed me until I tore at his back for more.

When it was over we both felt hideously guilty with what we had just done. Adam's name lay like a shameful blanket over us, and I began to cry quietly. Dan rolled over, gathered me in his arms and hushed me. When I stopped crying, I got re-dressed and silently slipped from the pool house.

When I got into bed, Adam rolled over and slipped into a curl behind me, murmuring "I love you" into my neck. The next morning I told Adam I had heaps to do, and we left Dan's house.

I pushed the incident into the back of my mind, vowing not to tell Adam as it would only hurt him. We continued our lives together and were still blissfully happy. And then I found out I was pregnant.

Sick with dread, I waited out my nine months. I hadn't told Adam about what had happened, and Dan and I made a deal to keep our sordid secret. When we told Adam's family I was pregnant, they were all ecstatic.

Dan pulled me aside later, asking me what I was planning on doing. I lied to him and told him that there was nothing to do as I was still taking the contraceptive pill at the time of his party.

When Rory was born, Dan came to the hospital to see us. Adam was about to go home and get me some more clothes, so he left me "in Dan's capable hands". Dan looked down at me and the baby and his eyes welled with tears. He broke down and told me that he loved me, and he wished more than anything the baby was his. I told him that it wasn't and he gave me a gentle kiss on the cheek, kissed the baby's head, and slipped out to door.

To this day, I'm still unsure who's Rory's dad is, and I'm only glad Dan and Adam look alike.

Your say:Have you had a similar experience? Share your stories and thoughts below.

User comments
you've made a teriible mistake, we all mkae them but its how we deal with them that effects the rest of our life. Yes you have been unfaithfull, not the first person to do this and certainbly you won't be the last. BUT the poor man, to look at you holding that baby, will be left wondering for the rest of his life if this child is his. . . you cannot do this to him, it is unfair, to him, your husband, your son and yourself. Please be Brave and do a DNA test with Dan. You maybe lucky, but if not you may have to just have to find the courage to DO THE RIGHT THING.
Cut the 'poor me' game. You made a choice, and lets be honest here, you could have stopped this when you had doubts about the father & possibly saved hurting everyone else around you but clearly you are too selfish for that. I feel really sorry for your husband and son. What the hell were you doing having unprotected sex anyway??? Do you not know what an STD is? Wise up sweetheart! I strongly suggest you see a psychaitrist as you are going to need professional help with this one.
Women like you make me physically sick. How the hell do you live with yourself?
This probably would never have happened if the two of you hadn't been drinking. Alcohol reduces your inhibitions. You said "I realised this was bad, but let him keep leaning in". If there was no alcohol in the picture, once you realised it was bad, you would have stopped him. Your intense guilt afterwards shows that this wasn't something you would normally allow yourself to do. I know alcohol is widely seen as harmless in moderation, with only binge drinking getting the negative attention, but it's little irreversible instances like this that show even moderate amounts can have huge ramifications that harm a lot of innocent people around you. Just something for everyone to consider...
The three males in this story deserve way better than you. Studies have revealed women are more likely to cheat when they are most fertile, around ovulation, and studies have also found women are more likely to orgasm when cheating therefore the cheating males sperm is far more likely to live longer and impregnate the cheating women. The cheating woman doesn't do this consciously “I am going to have sex with this other guy around day 6 after my period starts and I'm going to have a massive orgasm and then get pregnant. Evolution works more subconsciously.We are animals, plain and simple. Some people are better at controlling these natural impulses others like this woman concerned are doomed. I can see this pitiful woman at 45 years old, she'll be on her own, with 4 or 5 kids to 2 or 3 different men. These easy women, who have trouble controlling themselves end up in all sorts of trouble. Some guy will end up paying for the child for 18 years, probably then to find out its not his.
Good luck but be very ashamed of yourself, hope your son does not get a serious illness where he needs a blood transfusion from his Dad, you have a lot of explaining then if he is your Brother In Laws son. Don't understand your thinking and how you can just sit there and look into your husbands, you are a cheat.
seriously?! have you ever read the confessions in Woman's Day?? You had to expect these comments. If you really do need advice, get a DNA test and then leave tas, regardless of the outcome.
You are one selfish person, I AM CHEATING WIFE...with GUILT. What did you expect? Have you never heard the phrase "Don't air your dirty laundery in public,". Well you did and you have to accept the backlash that comes with it. Sure some people will sympathize with you and some won't. You have to accept that not everyone agrees with what you did. When BiL was leaning in, you should have stopped it there and then, but you didn't. Why not? Probably wanted it as much as he did, because you didn't think of your husband for one minute. Now an innocent child has been brought into you and you BiL's tangled web of lies. Yes, your BiL is as much to blame. It will come out, it always does, then you can add the guilt of tearing an innocent family apart to you list of woes. And you will be the biggest loser as there will be no winners. And in case you haven't guessed, I have no sympathy. I'm not perfect but have never cheated on my husband, nor would I. I took my Wedding Vows seriously.
Tell your husband, you want a honest marriage, don't you? And if you don't... karma will eventually come around, so do the right thing! BTW if you love your husband so much, you would have gone to bed with him instead of getting it on with his brother...
Is it only the people who do not agree with what you did who do not understand. My brother had this exact thing happen, though he found out when my nephew needed a bone marrow transplant "Bad news, your son is dying, oh wait, he isn't your son" Just what every man wants to hear. You did wrong, now face up to it and stop playing the victim. Nut up or shut up! And to The Stump - cheating is cheating no matter who is doing it, male or female. You make a promise to someone, you keep it.

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